Colossians 3:12-17
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. (ESV)
The chosen ones have their confidence in God not on the basis of their faith (“con fide” with faith) but on the basis of their having been chosen by God. The putting on of qualities is not a “front” or a false representation of who we are and what we aspire to. Putting on these qualities is like those in the military who are preparing themselves for conflict, not as in donning a costume to act the part like one may perform in a play.
The qualities that we are to put on:
Compassionate hearts (bowels of mercy, literally) referring to the center of our emotions and the tender connection we have with others. We feel it in our “gut.”
Kindness. The principle “by which we make ourselves amiable.” This quality makes us easy to live with. This is the inner principle, that describes our inner motivations in what we do, rather than the outward manifestations of our actions (see Calvin, ad loc., Colossians 3:12-13). Kindness comes from deep within us and is not concerned about how it looks or who is impressed with how we react.
Humility. To have a thought about yourselves that is small, not grand. “Small thinking” of one’s self it to consider yourself as one who could serve everyone in your fellowship. Great thinking would be the opposition of humility and it would make us unteachable, and incapable of serving others.
Meekness. The gentle spirit of the redeemed, presents itself with unassuming sweetness. The outward manifestation of the quality of the Christ-like heart. Kindness in appearance and in speech. Calvin, “as, however, it frequently happens, that we come in contact with wicked and ungrateful men, there is need of patience that it may cherish mildness in us” (Calvin, Commentaries, Colossians 3:13, 213).
Patience. The long-way-to-anger. Not the short way. Not the explosive way to anger. The long, slow, thoughtful, reflective, enduring way to anger. To be like Christ in our anger.
Forgiving one another. The verbal for of the word “grace” is used. “Gracing one another” means that the motive and power, the force and essence of forgiveness, is in the grace that we have received from God. If God has been gracious with us, we, therefore, must be gracious with others, especially those who share the experience of the grace of God infusing our life with the life of Christ, as Christians in the Body of Christ.
Love. Christ’s love.
“As, however it is a thing that is hard and difficult, he confirms this doctrine by the example of Christ, and teaches, that the same thing is required for us, that as we, who have so frequently and so grievously offended, have nevertheless been received into favor, we should manifest the same kindness toward our neighbors, by forgiving whatever offences they have committed against us” (Calvin, Commentaries, Colossians 3:13, Colossians, 213).
These qualities come into reality in the day-to-day relationship that we have with one another. We may think we are kind, until it is necessary to endure an insult or a shun, or a lie, or an outburst from someone. Then your kindness may be short and your anger quick. An untested kindness may think Biblical kindness is easy, when it is, in fact, miraculous. Most marriage fights could be stopped immediately if kindness were used by one of the two. If both possessed and used this kindness, the fight would never have started in the first place.
Love before all.
These values (vss 12-13) are chosen. We value others and treat one another with honor. We value everyone because we have been forgiven. Paul saw that he was indebted to all because of the grace he received from God. He wrote, “I am under obligation both to Greeks and to barbarians, both to the wise and to the foolish” (Romans 1:14 ESV). Regardless of their reaction to you, your reaction to them should be filled with love, no matter what the circumstance.
Vs. 14 tells us that this kindness (and all the virtues described are driven not by duty, but by love. The translations generally have, “Above all these things,” but it is more “Before all these things, put on love.” Love is first in line and importance over all these virtues. The love we put on prepares the heart and mind for all the other qualities that flow out of the heart of love. Calvin says that all that is not regulated by love is “faulty” (on Colossians 3:14). He states is a complicated way that if we don’t love first, all that follows will be a failure. Here are Calvin’s words, “nothing in our life that is not well regulated [by love] if it is not directed toward it, but everything that we attempt [apart from love] is mere waste.”
Every relationship is to bring honor and glory to God and, especially in the Body of Christ, they are to express the character of Christ that is being formed in everyone who is touched by the Infinite grace of God. When infinite grace pours through your life, you have infinite grace to give to others, infinite forgiveness, infinite forebearance, kindness, gentleness, and the rest. The love that God has poured into your heart (Romans 5:5) now pours love out of your heart to others, especially those who share the experience of the love and grace of God in their lives, but not just to them.
In the Body of Christ we learn what true kindness is. We see true gentleness lived out. We watch with amazement true, wonderful, perfect patience. Because people are living the lives of redeemed people, filled with the love of Jesus Christ, and then he adds himself, living in them. Christ is in them.









